The Home Alone house is available for rent on Airbnb, you dirty pets

If you’ve got questionable parenting skills, a predilection for haphazard theft, or even you’ve just been abandoned by your family for the holidays – accidentally or not – well, does Airbnb have an offer for you!

On stage [checks notes] Winnetka, Ill. Is home to the iconic home of the 1990 holiday classic Alone at home, where a child humiliated and seriously injured two adult men who absoutely trying to kill him but somehow managed to come back for a sequel.

Buzz McCallister, the oldest of the McAllister children (played by Devin Ratray), allegedly listed the house for one night only on Airbnb. Adorable but murderous potential thieves not included.

Home Alone Airbnb

Sarah crowley Sarah Crowley / Airbnb

“Many Christmases ago the McCallisters went to Paris – well, most of us,” writes your intrepid host Buzz. “Although we are older and wiser now (I even have my own security company), we are never too old for the holidays. So while we’re on vacation (all of us, this time), I’m inviting a team of mischief-makers to let their eight-year-old children run free in my childhood home on December 12th. “

In addition to running the whole house, which is smaller than it looks, Buzz offers a “cozy holiday scene with twinkling lights and a perfectly pruned tree” and a “candlelight dinner of macaroni at the microwave Kraft cheese “. Also included is her tarantula pet Axl!

And on a rather meta note, Buzz adds that you can ‘chill out’ and ‘enjoy a viewing of the movie franchise’s latest vacation adventure, Home Sweet Home Alone, on Disney +. “Clever, clever, clever. You still have us, Disney +!

Although it looks like a mansion from the outside, the list only mentions two bedrooms and a one-and-a-half bath, which begs a question: how on earth did a family of what appear to be a thousand people have she could live there? A bath and a half? For five children? No wonder poor Catherine O’Hara couldn’t hold on.

Home Alone Airbnb

Home Alone Airbnb

Sarah crowley Sarah Crowley / Airbnb

If you feel like splashing your aftershave on your face and screaming in a mirror, this time in someone else’s bathroom, the Alone at home the house opens for booking on December 7th. One can only hope that Macaulay Culkin is huddled in a closet somewhere waiting to greet you and / or assault you.

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